i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
