So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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