I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
