dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize