The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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