He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize