sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
