He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
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