you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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