What tipped you off? The sombrero?
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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