This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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