i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
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