just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Randomize
