are you still at the devil's house?
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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