Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
