Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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