I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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