Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Randomize
