I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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