The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
