Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
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