you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
