I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
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