Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
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