he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
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