I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
