for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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