You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
