I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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