I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
