This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
