Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Randomize
