He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Randomize
