i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
