Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Randomize
