Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
