nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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