I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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