you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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