South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
