so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
