People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
