I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
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