i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
