i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
