he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
