Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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