Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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