no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
