I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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